A bar or bat mitzvah invitation has to tell guests who is being honored, who is hosting, when and where the celebration happens, what follows it, and how to reply. The checklist and examples below cover formal and modern tone, Hebrew names, single-parent and blended families, two children sharing a date, a party with its own guest list, and guests new to a Shabbat morning service. Examples labeled “complete template” include the full set of invitation details; the other examples provide opening or service wording to build on. Replace the sample names and dates, as well as every bracketed field, with your own details.
What a Bar or Bat Mitzvah Invitation Includes
- The honoree’s name. First name at minimum. Adding the middle name raises the formality. The Hebrew name is optional and traditionally set on its own line.
- The occasion, in words. When the honoree will be called to the Torah, “is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah” names it. When they will not, or when you prefer plainer language, “Please join us as we celebrate [Name] becoming a bar mitzvah” does the same work.
- The hosts. Usually the parents, sometimes with grandparents, sometimes phrased as the honoree inviting alongside them.
- Date and time. Spelled out for formal wording, in numerals for modern.
- The synagogue or venue, with the city. Full street address on the invitation or on a details line.
- What follows. A kiddush luncheon in the hall, a separate reception, an evening party, or all three.
- The events this guest is invited to, with a time and location for each.
- The reply. A line naming the method, and a deadline.
Naming the Occasion, and Where the Hebrew Name Goes
“Called to the Torah” carries the tradition, and it fits when the honoree will be called to the Torah during the service. It is a choice, not a requirement: where that is not part of the day, or where plainer wording suits the family, Please join us as we celebrate Eli becoming a bar mitzvah does the same work. Either line reads well in formal or modern tone.
If you are including the Hebrew name, it sits directly under the English name on its own line, frequently in parentheses or italics. The Hebrew name including the parents’ names is common, as in David ben Yosef v’Miriam for a son or Rachel bat Yosef v’Miriam for a daughter, while other families and congregations name one parent, use a different construction, or follow a house style of their own. Ask your clergy or the synagogue office which form they use. Some families print the Hebrew letters, some transliterate, and some do both. If Hebrew letters matter to you, check that your invitation can carry them before you settle on a design. One route on Greenvelope is to upload artwork as the whole card image (.jpg, .jpeg, .png, or PDF).
Formal Bar Mitzvah Invitation Wording
A complete template to customize. Replace every bracketed field with your own details.
Please share in our joy
as our son
David Michael
(David ben Yosef v’Miriam)
is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah
Saturday, the thirteenth of March
two thousand twenty-seven
at ten o’clock in the morning
[Congregation name]
[Street address]
[City, State]
Kiddush luncheon to follow in the social hall
The favour of a reply is requested by the twentieth of February
through the link in this invitation
Miriam and Joseph Stern
A second formal option, slightly warmer. Opening and service lines only; add your address, the events guests are invited to, and your reply line:
With gratitude and pride
we invite you to worship with us
as our son
Daniel Aaron
is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah
Saturday, the eighth of May
two thousand twenty-seven
at nine thirty in the morning
[Congregation name], [City, State]
Luncheon reception immediately following
Rachel and Michael Weiss
Formal Bat Mitzvah Invitation Wording
Opening and service lines only, in the fullest formal wording:
Please share in our great joy
as our daughter
Sarah Elizabeth
(Sarah bat David v’Leah)
is called to the Torah as a Bat Mitzvah
Saturday, the twentieth of November
two thousand twenty-seven
at ten o’clock in the morning
[Congregation name]
[Street address]
[City, State]
Kiddush luncheon to follow
Leah and David Kaplan
When grandparents are named alongside the parents, one option is to give them the line beneath:
Together with our parents
we invite you to share in our joy
as our daughter
Naomi Rose
is called to the Torah as a Bat Mitzvah
Saturday, the sixth of November, two thousand twenty-seven, at ten in the morning
[Congregation name], [City, State]
Deborah and Aaron Levin
Ruth and Samuel Levin
Esther Gold
Modern and Informal Wording
Modern wording swaps spelled-out dates for numerals, shortens the opening line, and sounds like the people sending it. Whether to keep the Torah line or use plainer wording is a free choice either way.
Opening lines only, for a service with a luncheon in the same building:
We are overjoyed to share that
our son Eli
is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah
Saturday, March 13, 2027 at 10:00 a.m.
[Congregation name], [City, State]
Kiddush lunch to follow
Miriam and Joseph Stern
A complete template to customize: a modern bat mitzvah with an evening reception at a second venue. Replace every bracketed field, including both venues.
Thirteen years ago we could not have imagined this day.
Please join us as our daughter Maya
is called to the Torah as a Bat Mitzvah
Saturday, June 5, 2027 at 9:30 a.m.
[Congregation name], [Street address], [City, State]
Kiddush luncheon following the service in the social hall
Dinner and dancing at 7:00 p.m.
[Reception venue], [Street address], [City, State]
Please use the invitation link to reply by May 8, 2027, indicating which events each guest will attend.
Anna and Ben Roth
Openings to swap in: we invite you to share in our celebration; with love and pride in our hearts; please join our family as; it would mean the world to us if you joined us as.
Wording the Host Line
Use the names the hosts prefer, in the order they agree on. These options read cleanly.
Both parents on one line. Miriam and Joseph Stern.
Two households hosting together. Giving each household its own line is one useful option, and the order is the hosts’ to settle:
Miriam Stern
Joseph Stern
invite you to share in their joy as their son
David Michael
is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah
Remarried parents. Giving each household its own line is one option, with the stepparent named if they are hosting: Miriam and Paul Berger on one line, Joseph and Dana Stern on the next.
One parent, guardians, two mothers or two fathers, different surnames. Name whoever is hosting, in the form they use: Miriam Stern; Dana Stern and Paula Reyes; Miriam Stern and Joseph Berger; Aviva Stern, grandmother and guardian. No invitation owes anyone an account of the family.
A parent who has died. Keep the two jobs separate: the host line names the people hosting, and remembrance goes in the body or on a line of its own, as in Daniel Aaron, son of Rachel Weiss and the late Michael Weiss, or Michael Weiss, of blessed memory. Many families use the Hebrew abbreviation z”l after the name instead. Choose the one your family says out loud.
The honoree as a co-host. Eli Stern, together with his parents Miriam and Joseph, invites you to worship and celebrate.
Twins, Siblings, and Shared Celebrations
B’nai mitzvah is the plural of bar mitzvah and is also used broadly for a group, while b’not mitzvah is the feminine plural, used for girls or women. Some communities also use b’nai mitzvah for a single honoree of any gender. Choose the term with the honoree and your congregation.
A complete template to customize: siblings sharing one celebration, with one set of hosts and one reply line.
Please share in our joy
as our children
Eli Jacob and Maya Ruth
are called to the Torah as B’nai Mitzvah
Saturday, March 13, 2027 at 10:00 a.m.
[Congregation name], [Street address], [City, State]
Kiddush luncheon to follow in the social hall
Please reply for each guest in your party by February 20, 2027 using the link in this invitation
Miriam and Joseph Stern
If the two are cousins rather than siblings, name both sets of parents as hosts on separate lines and keep the children’s names in the body together.
Adult Bat and Bar Mitzvah Wording
Adults who did not have a ceremony as children hold one later, individually or as a class. The wording shifts from parents hosting to the person inviting in their own voice. Opening lines only:
After many years of waiting
I will be called to the Torah as a Bat Mitzvah
and I would be honored by your presence
Saturday, February 6, 2027 at 10:00 a.m.
[Congregation name], [City, State]
Kiddush luncheon to follow
Judith Halpern
For a class celebrating together, the congregation usually hosts: [Congregation name] invites you to celebrate the Adult B’nai Mitzvah class of 5787 as they are called to the Torah.
Service, Luncheon, and Party: Which Events Guests Are Invited To
A mitzvah weekend often has different circles for different parts, and the wording has to be clear about that without making anyone feel sorted. Three approaches work.
One invitation, one list. Add a single line: Kiddush luncheon to follow in the social hall.
One invitation, extra card for the party. The service invitation goes to everyone, and those invited to the evening celebration also receive a reception line or a second card: Dinner and dancing to follow at seven o’clock, [Venue name], [Street address].
A separate party invitation. Written to the honoree’s friends rather than to their parents, and it should sound like it.
A complete template to customize: a party-only invitation. It says plainly that the morning service is not part of this invitation, and it gives parents an end time and someone to call.
Join us for dinner and dancing to celebrate Eli’s bar mitzvah.
Saturday, March 13, 2027, 8:00 p.m. to 11:00 p.m.
[Venue name], [Street address], [City, State]
Dinner, dancing, photo booth, dessert bar
Dressy attire; comfortable shoes recommended
This invitation is for the evening party only
Pickup is at 11:00 p.m. at the main entrance
Questions: [Host name], [Phone or email]
Please reply by February 20, 2027 using the link in this invitation
Who is invited to each part is settled by your wording and by the list you send to; a reply form only records what guests tell you. On an invitation covering several events, a checkbox question on the RSVP page lets each guest mark the parts they will attend, giving you a count for the service, the luncheon, and the party out of one send. It collects preferences and does not restrict eligibility.
Count people rather than households, because one household often splits across the weekend: two parents at the service and the luncheon, their teenager at the party only. A single yes or no cannot carry that, so ask per guest and per event rather than assuming a yes covers everything.
When different groups are invited to different parts, send each group its own version of the invitation, carrying only the events and questions that group should see. On single-mailing pricing that means buying each mailing separately; annual memberships have their own guest-count tiers and ask that each mailing serve a unique purpose, so check what your plan covers before counting on it for several versions of the same event. Contact tags are a narrower tool: Greenvelope’s documentation says tags can target survey questions to specified recipients, which is not the same as varying the event details each guest sees, so confirm what your setup actually does before relying on it. Our guide to adding custom questions to an online RSVP covers the question formats, and the full mechanics are in the complete guide to collecting RSVPs online.
Save the Date Wording
Mitzvah dates are often set with the synagogue well in advance, which is an advantage most events do not have. Once the date is firm, a save the date six months to a year out gives out-of-town family time to book. Keep it short, and leave the reply off, since a save the date asks for no RSVP.
Save the date
Eli Stern is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah
Saturday, March 13, 2027
[City, State]
Invitation to follow
General save the date guidance for other events is in our save the date wording guide, and timing for every event type is in the invitation timing guide.
The RSVP Line
Formal: The favour of a reply is requested by the twentieth of February. Modern: Please reply by February 20. Digital: Please reply using the link in this invitation by February 20.
Three to four weeks before the date is a useful planning figure, but the date that governs is the day your caterer or venue needs final numbers: work back from that and leave a buffer for following up. From the tracking page you can send or schedule an RSVP reminder email, which goes to the contacts who have not yet responded rather than to the whole list. Reminders are something you set up, not something an entered deadline triggers, and the documented reminder is an email, so a guest you can only reach by phone needs a text or a call instead. If guests are choosing a meal, say so on the invitation rather than leaving it as a surprise on the reply form, and ask about allergies in the same place.
Wording for Guests Unfamiliar With the Service
Many mitzvah guest lists include people who have never been to a Shabbat morning service, and a line or two below the wording block or on a details card spares them from guessing. Customs and policies differ between communities, so confirm each line with your congregation before you print it. None of this belongs in the formal wording block.
- All are warmly welcome at the service. Add what your congregation provides, such as head coverings at the entrance.
- The service lasts about [Length]. Fill in your congregation’s answer, and invite guests to arrive later only if your congregation is comfortable with that; some ask latecomers to wait for an usher.
- A kiddush luncheon follows in the social hall. Gloss the word if your guests will not know it: kiddush is a blessing recited over wine or grape juice to sanctify Shabbat or a holiday, and a kiddush luncheon is the meal following the service.
- [Attire] in the sanctuary, [Attire] for the evening reception. Sanctuary dress, including any covering your congregation asks for, is a separate question from party dress; answer both rather than putting one label on the day.
- Photography is not permitted during the service. We will have plenty at the party. Confirm the policy either way first.
- Gifts are not expected. Eli is collecting for the food bank as his mitzvah project if you would like to contribute.
Sending It
A mitzvah list spans guests who prefer email and guests who will reply only to a text, so choose the channel each guest actually uses; running two parallel lists is how numbers go wrong. Greenvelope sends one invitation from one guest list by email, by text message to numbers in supported countries, or through a link guests open and reply on, and records the responses submitted through the invitation against each guest, with survey questions in dropdown, multiple choice, checkbox, and write-in formats. Single mailings start at $19 for a guest list of up to 20 people, with pricing based on list size and no subscription required. A card can also be edited for up to five months after you send, with the update appearing on cards guests already received. Correcting the card is not the same as telling guests, though: when a name, time, or venue changes in a way guests need to act on, send them a message as well.
If you are still choosing where to send from, our comparison of the best bar and bat mitzvah invitation platforms ranks seven options on design, delivery, and RSVP depth, and the thank you card message guide covers what to write once the gifts arrive. To see designs rather than wording, browse digital bar mitzvah invitations and bat mitzvah invitations, or our blog roundup of bat mitzvah invitation designs.
Frequently Asked Questions
What should a bar or bat mitzvah invitation say?
It should name the honoree, say what the day is, name the hosts, list the events this guest is invited to with a time and location for each, and give a reply line with a deadline. For the occasion itself, “is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah” fits when the honoree will be called to the Torah, and “Please join us as we celebrate [Name] becoming a bar mitzvah” works when they will not. Formal wording spells out the date and time and often adds the Hebrew name on its own line; modern wording uses numerals and a shorter opening. On a digital invitation the reply questions sit on the RSVP page, so meal choices and which parts of the weekend each guest is attending come back with the reply.
How far in advance should you send bar and bat mitzvah invitations?
As planning guidance, send a save the date six months to a year ahead once the date is firm, then send the invitation six to eight weeks before the date. For the reply deadline, three to four weeks out is a useful starting figure, but work back from the day your caterer or venue needs final numbers and leave room to follow up, since that is the date that governs. The consequence for the wording is that the save the date and the invitation should say consistent things and reach the same people.
How do you word a bar mitzvah invitation when the parents are divorced?
Use the names each parent prefers, in the order they agree on; giving each household its own line is one option that reads cleanly, and the invitation does not need to explain anything. If a parent has remarried and the stepparent is hosting, that household can take its own line together. When two households are hosting, you can add the other parent to a Greenvelope mailing as a cohost, which lets them edit the design, details, and guest list, send the mailing, send messages and reminders, and track responses, without access to your address book, account settings, or purchases.
Do you include the Hebrew name on a bar or bat mitzvah invitation?
It is optional and entirely a family preference. When it is included it traditionally sits directly beneath the English name on its own line, often in parentheses or italics. The Hebrew name including the parents’ names is common, as in David ben Yosef v’Miriam for a son or Rachel bat Yosef v’Miriam for a daughter, while other families and congregations name one parent, use a different construction, or follow a house style of their own. Families print it in Hebrew letters, in transliteration, or in both, and all three are correct. Ask your congregation which form they use before the invitation goes to print or to send.
How do you word an invitation for twins or siblings sharing a bar or bat mitzvah?
Name both children together in the body, put the hosts on the host line, and use one reply line that asks which guests in the recipient’s party will attend. For the term itself, b’nai mitzvah is the plural of bar mitzvah and is also used broadly for a group, while b’not mitzvah is the feminine plural used for girls or women; some communities also use b’nai mitzvah for a single honoree of any gender. Choose the term with the honorees and your congregation. If the two are cousins, name both sets of parents on separate host lines.
Should the service and the party go on the same invitation?
They can, when everyone invited to one is invited to the other. The invitation then lists every part of the weekend, and a checkbox question on the RSVP page lets each guest mark which parts they are attending, giving you a separate count for the service, the luncheon, and the party from one send. That question collects preferences; who is invited is decided by your wording and your guest list. Count individuals rather than households, since one household can split across the weekend. When different groups are invited to different parts, send each group its own version of the invitation with only the events and questions it should see.
How do you word an invitation for guests unfamiliar with a Shabbat service?
Keep the formal wording block as it is and put the practical notes below it or on a details card: that all guests are warmly welcome, what the congregation provides such as head coverings, roughly how long the service runs, what to wear in the sanctuary and what to wear to an evening reception, and whether photography is permitted during the service. A gloss on kiddush helps too: it is a blessing recited over wine or grape juice to sanctify Shabbat or a holiday, and a kiddush luncheon is the meal following the service. Confirm each note with your own congregation, since customs and policies differ between communities.
What do you write on a bar or bat mitzvah save the date?
A few short lines are enough: the words save the date, the honoree and what the day is, the date, the city, and a note that an invitation will follow. Leave off the times, the venue address, and the party details, which are the things most likely to change between the save the date and the invitation, and leave off the reply, since a save the date asks for no attendance RSVP. Send it six months to a year out. A Greenvelope save the date can separately invite guests to submit a mailing address, which saves to their contact record when they submit it; that is address collection, not an attendance reply.
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